Sunday, February 05, 2012

If only it was that simple...

The other day I found this image on Working in a bar, I realized how this approach could solve a lot of problems. Imagine it's 5am in a bar with mostly guys who have failed to "hook-up" with a young drunk hottie. A female enters the bar. The music and time seem to stop as all eyes target the poor woman who has just walked through the door. Before she can get to the bar it's as if an injured baby seal swam into shark infested waters. They begin to circle. They are all unaware this woman just got off of work and all she wants to do is sit down, have a cocktail, smoke a few cigarettes, and be left alone. Unfortunately this shall not be. One by one they take turns trying to buy her a drink or engage in small talk. Sooner than later the woman becomes annoyed and exits, leaving me with a bunch of dude once again. There needs to be a way for guys to know which girls are approachable and which ones should be left alone. Maybe a sign like a facebook status? This may not work because most guys are terrible at reading signs, even if they are blunt and to the point. I was going to photoshop this picture with suggestions; but I am far too lazy so you will have to use your imagination. Here are some of my ideas:
"Leave me alone!"
"Not interested"
"I am lonely, please talk to me."
"No thanks! I'm fine."
"You have nothing to offer"
"Fair game"

This started to seem a little too complicated. I think a simpler solution would be similar to a stop light.

A green light would mean I am presently available for interaction with anyone. I'm here to party! Let the good times roll!

A yellow light would mean approach with caution. May interact with the right person.


A green light that turns yellow in the middle of a conversation could mean I thought you were harmless at first and now you are starting to creep me out. Please gracefully say goodbye and walk away before the light turns red.

I know none of these ideas would solve all of the problems but maybe it's a start. for now I guess I will just have to sit back and watch the shit show unfold.

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